come as you are

Published September 21, 2021

If you’re a Nirvana fan then you’ve probably already got “as you were, as I want you to be…” floating through your head after reading the subject line. I won’t deny the intentionality of that on my part. However, what I really want to talk to you about today is how often we don’t completely “come as we are.”


We are layered onions, are we not?

There are layers to our personalities

Don’t you feel that in some ways you show a different side of your personality to your boss than you do to your romantic partner? A different side to that frenemy on social media than to your mother?

And it’s not like we’re even consciously choosing to embody or show these personalities to different people: they just show up out of habit or instinct. To be clear, I’m not saying that this is necessarily a bad thing, but I am inviting the opportunity to examine it mindfully.

I don’t know about you, but my thinking and my unconscious belief systems sure can run the show so much of the time.

If I have a feeling or an impulse that I don’t think is allowed, my thinking will immediately shield me from it, even to the point of pretending I never had the feeling. A few blatant examples of these kinds of impulses might include feeling attraction towards a person who’s off-limits, feeling rage at someone else’s choice, or feeling sadness or grief in response to some choice we ourselves have made.

The great thing about creative practice is that there is no need for additional layers of protection or filters. You can come exactly as you are. You can acknowledge the very microscopic truths (as Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks would call them) that are happening in your heart, in your guts, in the back of your throat.

There’s plenty of room for them in the creative process. There’s actually an invitation to greater and greater clarity and honesty.

And at the same time, there’s a vast inner landscape–it’s infinite, in fact–available to you for unpacking, examining, getting messy with, and catalyzing your actual moment-to-moment true experience.

When you enter this realm, you find that all thoughts of “haven’t all the songs been written already?” fall away because the depth of truth in this realm is always startling, engaging and awe-inspiring.

Plus, it feels amazing. It’s exhausting holding up this architecture of our personalities so much of our time. The lush relief of simple presence, simple listening, and playful creativity is better than a vacation to the Fiji Islands. And it’s completely available to you right now.

Take your time, hurry up, Choice is yours, don’t be late,
Gary
for golden lotus studio
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Gary Grundei, founder | composer

Gary Grundei, founder | composer

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